The Word is No

We have a toddler in the house, soon to be two years old. He can be very endearing, especially when he rushes over to give a hug for no apparent reason, other than to show his general affection for Nana. He greets everyone he sees on the street with a lilting "Hi!", even the football players playing on the field at the high school. And he says "bye" very sweetly when he leaves the room. I  respond "write when you get work." 

He is also a recent specialist in the use of the word "no." He says it with a definitive shake of his head, even when he really means yes. Cookies, hugs, towels, toys, have all been rejected and there is no use in pursuing further inquiry. The word is no. 

I find this quite hilarious, and at times frustrating. I would like him to know that if he says yes to a hug, he can still say no later to a toy. But we haven't gotten there yet. "No" is for right now almost a state of being. He has discovered the word and he means to use it, against all adult attempts at persuasion otherwise. 

When my daughter was in elementary school, she would say with a sigh, "I can't wait until I get free will." (Religion classes were required in her school.) She was to learn that Free Will, whether personal autonomy or the religious kind comes with boundaries, and I don't know a single adult who doesn't chafe at some point about a boundary or two, sprinkled here and there throughout the day. Long red lights. The Ten Commandments. Cars that lose a head gasket on the freeway.

Toddlers don't take to boundaries even when accompanied by a snack. They are met with "no" from adults, and they respond in kind. No. Not on your life. Over my dead body. 

Some toddlers grow up to be adults who don't take to boundaries. especially religious ones. 

The blessed among us, in imitation of Mary, say yes fully, unreservedly, to cookies, and to the call of holiness. 

May the toddler inside us all learn the beauty and freedom of yes, fiat, according to your will.